"last time I checked, we live off crazy."

What a sunny Christmas! I remember freezing my ass off in the previous one, but this one gave me a new feeling with its warmth. Ironic to the sensation, today was spent very ordinarily with fam and movies. After gifts and fun, I went to watch National Treasure with my brother. Yay for brother-sister bonding time! When we were getting popcorn, we both realized we're short on money. All of the sudden, the man standing in front of us handed me a dollar, saying he doesn't want to sit in a theater knowing that someone is hungry. And a merry Christmas. We thanked him and repeated how nice he was after. The movie was suprisingly good with its suspense and random outbursts of humor. On moments that led me into a conclusion, another conflict would begin. Amongst the numerous scenes, this one line wouldn't leave my head, "Last time I checked, we live off crazy."

In all the hectic and the crazies in the world, we tend to forget the sentimental things. At some points this year, I saw myself running ‘till I reached a certain point without much thought and recognition. With that, I came to realize how quickly this year is coming to an end. Time, it sometimes seems as if it's passing too fast for me to handle. Basically, this year sum up as big rush of changes. Both good and bad. But it’s true I grew as a person and I feel more grown-up and less child. And I have to say, that's a pretty darn good feeeling. As much as I enjoyed this year though, I must say I’m anticipating the year to come. 2008 baby! Well. Merry Christmas, evweeeyone! (=

all i want for christmas is you!

Christmas break is off to a good start. A fatty weekend and one more day 'till Xmasss! After school on Friday, I walked to Wahoo's with bunch of kids to munch on onion rings and laugh our heads off about absolutely nothing. Hahaha. Later, I met up with Mariaa to catch up on talks under In-N-Out lights. Until Jacob called her to do an impossible dare for 100 dollars. It would have been quite hilarious, but after series of dilemmas, she ended up not doing it. Bummer! With a sudden craving for pearl drinks, Verde was our next destination. At one point, me and my three white friends felt out of place among the crowd of Asians. How strange of me. But of course, those feelings were long gone when we began sipping on our green teas and pearl drinks.

First CENT practice on Saturday. Moments of awkwardness at first, but after awhile, I was dancing with the rest of the team. Everyone was nice and friendly. The little party after was cool with getting to know people and mmm, the foood.

I woke up on Sunday morning dead tired. Reluctantly, I pulled my glasses on; my eye infection was slowly killing my eyes. After the usual routine of practice and service, I looked for things to entertain myself with other bored friends. Which included recording a dumb video of us singing, watching Disturbia on a projector (failure), and making pizza sandwiches (Hey! We were hungry). And this whole time, I attempted to sell 10 shirts for CENT. Thanks to my generous church members, I sold 3 shirts and another 3 are on hold. Yaaaay! Oh, if you want a funkylicious CENT shirt, dial my number. It comes in two fabulous colors: red and blue.

Todaaay! I got last-minute shopping done. A very productive trip. I almost screamed when I discovered the black suspenders I've been looking after for months of looking for the perfect ones. I couldn't help but place it among numerous gifts boxes and bags. Only this would be just for moi. (=

bittersweet

That's how my day went. First period, nice talks with Joyce. Stuff to catch up to. And Fitness was hillllllllarious. We were all measuring and I was laughing with Britney the whole time. "Yo chubba chubbas?" HAHA. And we were both making fun of Danny and his womanly arms. At one point, Britney threatened to whip Danny with the measuring tape. Hahaha. Oh man, I love those kids. And then downfall of mood by the time I had to give my persuasive speech. Argh, if only I didn't have a nervous attack all of the sudden dasdasfdsgjhd. Ohhh, I watched Hairspray today! Laaav that movie <3 Mm, I really enjoyed the choir concert last night. Waaay better than the last one, even though me and Ronna were in verge of sleeping at one point. Hahah. It was fun hanging with everyone. And I met a fag named Michael, ha. So I'm joining choir next year, fassho! I just have to figure out how I'll fit that with yearbook in my schedule. hah, I'm excited for tomorrow. And 2 weeks of parrty time, yay!

good music keeps me company

Currently listening:
RJ Helton - Missing Me
Shayne Ward - Breathless

My left eye is showing no sign of healing.

So I’ve been listening to lots of Trey Songz and Shayne Ward music lately. Their voices possess an unbelievable ability to calm an aroused mind. I find myself most relaxed when listening to the soft rhythm and absorbing its lyrics. This weekend, I looked through my old favorites, stuff I haven’t listened to in weeks. And just listening to those caused a new sensation for me. The dullness of the repeated words revealed its new side and left me overwhelmed.

chills running down my spine

I can feel a sickness coming over me. I’m feeling extremely lousy with the developing eye infection (eeek!) and lack of sleep. Yupp, staying up after 3 is never a good idea. It’s true miracle I was able to wake up this morning after three hours of sleep. Eh. School today was nothing more than an ordinary boring Monday where I wished it was the weekend all over again. After school, Pedrum gave me a ride home in his supercool van. As soon as we all got in the car, he put on some unknown funk music and started "going dumb" with Danny. Haha his words. I couldn’t help but laugh through the whole ride. Hahah, those kids are hilariousss. Later, I went vintage store shopping with my mom. Purchased Earnest Sewn and Marc Jacobs denim for ninety dollars. Boy, I was haaaapy, but it seems like that happened so long ago now. Ha, time flies too fast after naps. I didn’t intend to take one, actually. I just fell asleep on my math homework. Arrrrgh, I’m so worn out and exhausted. That’s all I’m saying nowadays. I have a strong desire to give up the coming weekend and dedicate it to nonstop sleeping. Sighhh.
It’s nowww the last week before the vacation I’ve been waiting for. I have so much planned already, but two main things: hair fix-up and sleeping. Hahaha, I get bored of my haircuts too easily. Bad habit. Mm, I wanna try out something hella funky this time. Major color change and more layers. Ahhhh, I “can’t help but wait.”

anticipative self

This weekend was, again, a longass one. And it was definitely not a relaxing, laid-back one. But tight scheduled two days where I struggled to fit things together and tried to get everything done. Therefore, with my ass running around everywhere, my attempt to “relax” failed. What I mean by relax at this point is the art of sleeping. GAH! The earliest bedtime for me this week was 12:00 in the morning, for goodness sake. I feel like I’m killing my body. I doubt I have any healthy blood to donate to those in need tomorrow. K, tomorrow, I shall consume five healthy meals and sleep 4373 hours. Psh, yeah right.

So Friday, I was supposed to watch I’m Legend with Kevin and other guys on Friday. But I didn’t go since I decided I was too tired and figured it would be way too crowded. (I’m a fan of sitting at an almost-empty theater.) And now I regret itttt ‘cause some kids are babbling about how great it was. And its suspenseful thrills. Boo.

Well I guess the wedding on Saturday made up for it.

Plates of good food?! Eh, not really.
Karaoke with B and his buddies? Maybe.

Hahaha, it’s always fun singing with bunch of Korean, or should I say koreanized, guys. I can never stop laughing. It would have been more entertaining if I knew how to rap though, heheh. Dimanche. Unfortunately, shouts of agony and exhaustion occurred today. Mood swings, you may call them. I guess I was just worn out from everything. And I wanna say a little thanks to all my YOM members for always being there for me. Thanks laaaaaavs <3 Ha, I went to H&M earlier. The new one at Great Mallll. Ah! Something to recover from my disappointment of Santana Row’s. I bought two pretty scarves for myself. Oh happiness! Mmmmmm, I’m currently anticipating the coming week. An audition to go to, shopping trips to get done, lunches to be eaten, etc. Hahah. And for all the things that will be brought and revealed into my life. And, of course, freedom from school-hell. (=

the wake-up call

Wednesday: Mm, good day. Encounter with people I missed seeing made me smile crazy smiles, hahaha.

So, a lot has been going through my mind lately.
I see myself trying to go with the flow, lying back to watch all that life has to offer. At the same time, I pretend to be oblivious of all the negativity. "Everything is going to be fine." But when I’m abandoned in that place called reality, I know I’m lying to myself. It’s like a wake-up call tugging at me. “Wake up from your dreamworld, girl; life ain’t easy,” something tells me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m trying to get myself out of whatever trap I got myself into. But it’s only then when I realize I’m not strong enough to take whatever life is throwing at me. At least not yet. Inside, I’m a big baby who needs caring. I hate to admit it, but yeah it’s true and I know I can’t deny an obvious truth. I just can’t help but wonder numerous things. I always have to remind myself to have a limit in my curiosity for it can lead to frightening outcomes.

I’m now discovering the nature of people.
I’m now more careful in handling with the issue of trust.

All I want is for the carefree character to come back in my life.

This is yet another jumble of random words. But at least it speaks my confused heart. Ah, I’m in need of major vacation from everything. Just 7 more days to go, and I’m good.

"be assertive and you will win."

ZOMGGGG, Saturday was the BOMB. Longass day, but I was not at all tired by the end. Just giddy and awake. (= Well here are the highlights of the beyond-plain-amazing day: So, to my surprise, I was able to wake up at 8 on a Saturday morning. Got ready and headed to first community service of the day - clothes drive. Bunch of kids came and it was fun just laughing about all the random stuff people donated. Toilet seat covers, old thongs, etc. Hahah! Max was in charge of sorting out underwear items btw ‘cause rest of us were freaking out just looking at them. 11:30 AM my hands and feet were in verge of hypothermia from hardcore sorting. 12:00 PM hamburgers without tomatoes never tasted that gooood. After lunch, people started leaving and those of us who were left took hella pictures of ourselves talking, eating, and jumping. Oh fuun! Then I came back home, cleaned room, took a quick nap, picked up some Quiznos, and then Barns and Noble for giftwrapping.

That’s when the real fun started. I arrived earlier than everyone else so I sat down with those fashion books. Oh, a quick reminder: I must buy The Tokyo Look Book next time I stop by there; it’s the shiiiit. After awhile, kids started coming – Maria, Kylie, Julie, and others. Me and Maria talktalked until we decided we’re hungry. “Let’s go to DSW and eat shoes.” And I had a craving for coffee so we just went out and figured out there’s absolutely nowhere to eat around the area. When I suggested walking to Santana Row, Maria thought I was crazy so I was like fine, I’ll go to 7-eleven and get cheap coffee. Which I did. When we came back, there was no one to wrap books for. So we all grabbed some sex books and started taking randomass pictures. Pictures, laughing, more laughing. HAHAHA.

Later, I started wrapping books although I completely lack wrapping skills. I was actually enjoying the whole thing until this old lady with unzipped pants came up to the table. And all of the sudden, she started bitching at us about our wrapping paper and how cheap it is of Barns and Noble to provide such low quality papers for her high priced books. IT’S FREE GIFT WRAPPING, FOR GOODNESS SAKE. In the middle of all this, Maria let out a small laugh and the woman goes, “Is something funny?” And that was enough to get us to leave the table to laugh our heads off in the corner. I was told later that she bitched at Julie and Kylie about how teenagers are nowadays and other bull. Btw, thanks for zero dollar donation to kids in Kenya. At 10, I headed to In-n-Out with Maria, Michael, and Jacob. New friends, haha. While we were gobbling down burgers, some weird, funny shit happened there. But it’s too risky to mention, so never mind, haha. And yes, the car ride was definitely fun too.

Mmm, well! I must say yesterday was so worth not going to formal and wasting 200 bucks. Whoa, I can’t believe I still remember everything in details. About the only thing that sucked was the crappy freezing weather, but coffee and humor kept me warm. Gosh, speaking of humor, I think I laughed enough to last me weeks. Ahhh, I don’t want this weekend to end. >:/ Mhmm. This post became too long, but I believe memories like this deserve to be recorded. (= Ha, I’m officially joyous.

weeshes and hopes

This is ridiculous. It’s true that I’ve been caught up with schoolwork and all this week. But how can I forget Christmas is in less than two weeks. Facebook reminded me, for goodness sake. So right now, 18 more days and 0 gifts. I shall raise the record this weekend. And make some green tea cupcakes for my worn-out self while I'm at it. I can seriously use time to revitalize from stressful school-hell. And this weekend shall be it. Shopping and pastries sound perfect. Hmm, and perhaps other personal wantings? (=

- Hairspray DVD in Shake & Shimmy Edition

- Little Miss Sunshine sweater (fredflare.com)

- Quilted Heart Boot in Purple (Urban Outfitters)

- BDG Brights Skinny Pant in Purple (UO)

- Heritage 1981 lumberjack jacket

- Metallic charm necklaces

- Scaaarves!

- Black suspenders

- Fashion collection books (In Vogue, Misshapes, etc)

- Nylon subscription

- American Apparel hoodie

- Harajuku Lovers Kogal Sneakers in Num-Nums

- Love Tee (UO)

- Beanie with pompom

- Body by Victoria Set

- Hello Kitty things

Yes, that'd be nice. Weeeell, a busy weekend is waiting for moi. See y'all in the dreamworld.

P.S. Ah, good music always makes my day (=

Love Me Like You’ll Never See Me Again.mp3

Whoaaaaaaa! November went by like woooooosh. I feel like Halloween was just yesterday and bam! Sweeet 16 and now it’s December. Gosh, being a carless 16 year old is no fun >:/

Hmm well, I just wanna end this year on a good note right now.
2007, so much happened and so many changes were brought into my life. And I'm happy to say it’s my best so far. (= This year taught me about myself; I figured out what I want to get out of my life and what lays ahead in my future. I admit that I’ve been slacking off lately though. I’ve been letting each day just pass by, really no sense of accomplishment there.

So I've decided it’s time to make changes. Well as of now, my ultimate goal = better grades. First, I reallllllllly need to break my procrastinating habits. I suffer every time I do it, but it’s getting worse day after day. BADBAD. And the lame excuses. Trying to brush things off with “Oh I’m lazy”s is not gonna cut it. Hm, but I have to say, I’ve been feeling stressful and worn out more often lately. Maybe it’s schoolwork. Perhaps just life? I dunno.

I just can’t wait ‘till when all this will be over.
Then brand-new me of 2008!

I’m officially in “I’M EXCITEEEED” status, ciao.